The 43rd U.S. President 's own words (taken directly from his "Greatest Hits" speeches to the UN, State of the Union, State of the Nation, state of his own mind, etc.) have been "over-dubya'd" onto a hip, house-hopping track that's whiter than the white-wash in Washington.
This song does what the Bush Administration's critics and supporters alike had thought impossible... makes the most powerful man in the free world string sentences together with ease... and in rhythm and rhyme!
The Commander-in-Chief tells it like only he can:
"If you want to fight evil... love your neighbor like you'd like to be loved yourself."
"Evil is evil and we will fight it with all our might."
"We're a compassionate people. We care deeply about neighbors in need."
"Either you're with the United States or you're NOT with the United States."
"This great country will show the world the true compassion and decency of a great nation."
"We'll use all tools at our disposal... we've got a fabulous military."
"I don't care... dead or alive, either way. It doesn't matter to me."
"I really, really like being the President."
SO WHY THIS RECORD?
There hasn't been one protest song throughout the whole lead-up to this very unpopular war. Remember the 60's, anyone? Where are the Bob Dylan's, the Joan Baez's, the Arlo Guthrie's of today? It seems the music industry has opted out. The beat goes on... but it's the beat of war drums.
Millions of protesters have marched throughout America and in major cities all over the world... but Bush has chosen to write them off as 'focus groups' that cannot sway him! So the beat goes on...
I tried to get this record put out by the majors but you know the story. Try getting in the door. So I've turned to indie-land. And CD Baby. And you folks who are reading this. As individuals we DO have the power... but only if we use it and take action. The action I took was to make the President himself be his OWN protest singer. Frankly, nobody does it better. He bad.
Take a listen. More than that... take action. BUY this thing. It's only five bucks. Think of it like a vote for peace of mind. A vote you can DUPLICATE over and over by GIVING IT AWAY. Rip it. Burn it. Mp3 it. I don't care... COPY IT and PASS IT ALONG. Maybe between us we'll shift public consciousness just one notch higher on the Volume Knob of Life. (Bush is supposed to be a Pro-Lifer, right?)
I'm serious... I WANT YOU TO PIRATE THIS CD! The more the better. I'm not making anything off it. CD Baby has to take four bucks for paperwork and fulfillment. The extra dollar barely pays my duplication costs. I'm not trying to raise money... I'm trying to raise AWARENESS. Time is short. And that beat still goes on...
So what are you waiting for? Click that little button that says "ADD TO CART". I promise you... you'll feel better knowing you have a say in your vote being heard. (It ain't being heard anywhere else.) But on the INTERNET, man... we can vote a thousand times if we want to. We can send it to friends and e-quaintances all over the world. Know someone in Europe, Jamaica, Afghanistan? Send them a copy. Got a friend at a radio station in Kuala Lumpur? All it takes is a mouse-click to make a different beat. Go on...
Click away. Better to shoot off Mp3's than M14's. With an army of clickers it just might reach enough ears to help shift the tide from the madness of a very much unwanted war... to the sanity of a very much wanted disarmament through peaceful, international pressure.
Okay, so I've got a one-track mind... Winning Without War. (Check out their campaign at MoveOn.org.) I'll shut up. I'm done, anyway. That's my blurb. That's the humble goal of this little one-track CD... to make everybody happy and bring about WORLD PEACE. (Just like all the Miss America's you can ever remember.) Don't you Miss America? I sure do.
And hey... even if it doesn't stop the war-mongers, at least you've got a damned funny record to play whilst we all watch those laser-bombs go down those chimney's again. Damned funny and damned scary too. When did you last get such a wide range of emotional thrills for a mere five bucks?
And the beat goes on...
By the way, if you feel moved to help in any way, all ideas are welcome. If you can get it to:
* any radio station that will play it
* any industry insider with clout
* any newspaper or magazine that will do a story on it
* ANY media at all
... feel free to burn CD's and mail them, or send Mp3's over the Internet. Just please give this contact information for follow-up:
Oh... and if you happen to have $100G+ to spare to help make the funniest video ever, I know just the guy to play Bush Doggie Dog. (Picture it... the perfect Bush look-alike in mink coat and gold chains... rapping with his band of Secret Service homies. Dead-ringers for Powell and Rumsfeld doing backup vocals! The world would eat it up. We need to defuse all this TENSION.)
Anyway, the guy's name is Steve Bridges. He bills himself as "Mr. President" and he's a frequent guest on Jay Leno. He only wants $100G to do it. Hmmm.
Well, thanks for your time.
(So have you ordered it yet?)
1. Axis Of Evil